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We were regaled with images of the same couple in bed, only this time all that was visible was a shapeless form underneath the sheets, and those very same sheets were moving in a very suspicious way indeed. It was obvious the couple were in the throes of a passionate spate of lovemaking, bumping and grinding with careless abandon.

The woman named Sookie, the one who’d been sobbing, now wailed like a banshee. “Not my Bennie-ie-ie-ie!” she cried.

“Yes, I’m afraid your Bennie has succumbed to the wily ways of seductress Mia,” said the show host, barely suppressing a hint of satisfaction.

“Oh, my God,” said Brutus, looking on with fascination. “I never thought Bennie would cheat on Sookie. They were the perfect couple! Everybody said so!”

It was obvious to me that Brutus was as big a fan of this Passion Island bonanza as Harriet and Gran.

Just then, Dooley came trudging down the stairs again, a very sleepy-looking Odelia in tow.“So what’s all this about the United Nations General Assembly?” she asked.

But Dooley had become distracted by the footage on TV. He stared at the wild sheet tussle for a moment, then asked,“What are those people doing, Max?”

Brutus and I immediately scrambled to grab the remote and change the channel. Unfortunately in our efforts to do so, the thing dropped to the floor and skipped underneath the couch. And as I aimlessly reached for the gizmo, I saw how Dooley approached the screen and stared at the footage of Sookie’s Bennie-ie-ie-ie and wily seductress Mia, whoever she was, performing feats of acrobatics, their modesty only covered by a thin sheet.

“Are they playing a game?” asked Dooley, wide-eyed now as he took in the scene.

“Um, yeah,” I said, still fruitlessly reaching underneath the couch. “Yeah, they’re playing a game of hide and seek.”

“Looks like they found each other,” said Dooley, quite astutely I might add.

“Oh, is that Passion Island?” asked Odelia, stifling a yawn. “I love that show.”

Brutus emitted a low groan.“Everybody loves that show,” he said.

“Yeah, even Mom and Dad watch every episode.” She frowned at the screen. “This is a rerun though, right?” Like a true addict, she sounded worried she’d missed something.

“Yeah, they’re gearing up for a new season, and started airing last season’s episodes to whet people’s appetites,” said Brutus, as the expert he clearly was.

Dooley had turned his head sideways and was still watching the couple intently.“It looks like they’re rubbing against each other,” he said finally, still that puzzled look on his face. “Why are they rubbing against each other, Max?”

“Um, I guess one of them has an itch,” I said, eliciting a smile from Odelia. Then, finally getting hip to my predicament, she fished the remote from underneath the couch, and quickly changed channels. A weatherman started waxing poetic about a low-pressure system moving in from the East, or itcould have been the West, and I breathed a sigh of relief. The danger had been averted, and Dooley’s innocence was safe once more.

“Harriet wants to be on that show,” said Brutus. “And Gran told her she’s going to help her.”

Odelia laughed.“Of course she did.” She patted Brutus on the head. “Don’t you worry about a thing, Brutus. The day Harriet is selected for Passion Island is the day hell freezes over.” And with these sage words, she entered the kitchen to start fixing herself and Chase some breakfast.

Chapter 3

Suddenly the sliding glass door that looks out onto the backyard opened and Gran walked in, followed by none other than Harriet herself. They both had those looks of determination in their eyes that spelled trouble.

“Odelia, there’s something I need to talk to you about,” said Gran in a tone of voice that brooked no contest.

“Oh, hey, Gran,” said Odelia. “Are you joining us for breakfast?”

“Yeah, sure,” said Gran. “Look, I’m going crazy next door, with your mom and dad in Europe, and I was thinking—“

“Coffee?”

“Yeah. So I’ve been thinking—“

“Milk and sugar?”

“You know I take my coffee black, honey,” said Gran, taking a seat on one of the high stools at the kitchen counter.

Odelia smiled, and I could tell she wasn’t fully awake yet. It takes a heavy dose of caffeine to accomplish that minor feat, and she hadn’t had hers yet.

Chase came stomping down the stairs, yawning cavernously and stretching.“I had the weirdest dream,” he announced to no one in particular. “I dreamt that I was on an island and there were only women. Can you imagine? I was the only male on an island filled with the most gorgeous wo—“ He suddenly became aware he was being intently watched by his future grandmother-in-law, and quickly shut up. Waking up on an island filled with gorgeous women may be every man’s fantasy, it clearly wasn’t Gran’s.

Odelia took it in stride, though.“Well, isn’t that a coincidence? I dreamt I was on a desert island filled with gorgeous men, all catering to my every need. Crazy, huh?”